| From | Message |
adam
Dodge Dakota
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7/14/2002
16:48:56
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 Subject: if you clean it they will sh!t
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Message:
just today i got my truck all cleaned up and waxed looked really good i left to run to the store and on the way home splat bird sh!t all over the hood i was pissed so i came home and cleaned it again my question is how can we stop thies damn birds
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Greg D.
Dodge Dakota
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7/14/2002
17:13:33
| RE: if you clean it they will sh!t
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Message:
I prefer the 12 guage-although if they are of the smaller sorts you may want to drop down to 20 guage. Have fun!
Greg
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J
Dodge Dakota
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7/14/2002
17:25:51
| RE: if you clean it they will sh!t
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Message:
Adam, I sympathize with your pain. Birds really are not conducive to clean paint jobs. God really messed up bit time on the 6th day of his tinkering when he created fowl to fly amuck.
But don’t fret my lad, I have almost completed my first working anti-bird poo system, codenamed Flawk of Pain. This system has the following componets: advanced polaris radar tracking system, Patriot High Pressure Water System (P.H.P.W.S.), and Frigimall Flamethrower Pack (F.F.P.).
So the genius thing is this, the tracking system constantly monitors any and all bird activity in a 50-m diameter around your vehicle. The tracking system has an advance A.I. that allows it to distinguish between birds and bird droppings. When the system detects a bird dropping being launched from a malicious bird and is targeted at your ride the P.H.P.W.S. fires precise and accurate bursts of pressurized water. Bird droppings are quickly annihilated.
After the initial fire fight the advance system then tags that bird as a hostile. If the bird ever comes within the 15-m no fly zone the F.F.P. will roast the bird down to its nuggets.
Sales will commence soon as quality assurance testing has been completed.
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DakotaDan
*GenIII*
7/14/2002
17:38:01
|  RE: if you clean it they will sh!t
IP: Logged
Message:
"LMAO"
good one J
Dan
K&N FIPK # 57-1517 * DynoMax #17748
OEM 5.2/5.9 V8 TB #53032691AA * Crower 1.7 Roller Rockers # 73654K
Factory Flares * WeatherTechs * Saddleman Low Profile Tonneau
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